I am so excited that something I've prayed about has finally been answered. I was not necessarily planning to be part of the answer, but I am excited that I am. So what is this great thing I am excited about? Well many months ago I felt very burdened for the young adults in our church. I had been praying for many of them for quite awhile and I felt we really needed a class that they could go to that didn't have anyone over 50. Both our adult classes have wonderful people in them, but they were all older and I sensed that our younger adults that came in those classes were a bit uncomfortable. The only other option was for them to go to the teen class, which after speaking to some of them this past Sunday, was not a real comfortable situation either. Well, as I said I had been praying for a class for these people. Daniel & I were talking about it one night while he was home this summer and he asked me a question I couldn't get out of my head. The question was "What are you going to do about it?" I said what am I going to do about it? I can't do anything about it. There had been a class at one time and a person who had been the teacher. I didn't want to step on anyone's toes and I didn't think I could teach it. I have only taught children. The more time went on the more the question bugged me. What was I going to do about it? I felt praying was the best I could do, then one Sunday morning in the adult class I attend we had three or four of the young adults in our class. We were beginning a study on Revelations. I looked around the class and really felt God impressing on me that I needed to do something. During the morning worship service I kept thinking there is no way I can teach adults, I can only teach children. I also kept thinking I can't suggest starting the class up again without talking to the previous teacher to make sure there would be no hard feelings. During the pastor's sermon he said, "If you feel God is asking you to do something, you really need to be doing it." I thought okay Lord I'll talk to the previous teacher and if this is really what you want me to do I will talk to the Sunday School Board tonight about my concerns and the possible solution. During the afternoon I prayed about it and went to our pub house to see what types of studies they had and I found a wonderful four book study that I felt would be great. Well the time finally came that I talked to the Sunday School Board. They thought it was a great idea. They asked if I had someone in mind and I told them unless they thought of someone else I would be willing to teach the class. I was astonished that they were so excited that I would be willing to teach this class. This really doesn't sound like a big deal, so we started a new class and so I am going to be the teacher. What's the big deal? Well, for me it is the fact that God placed a burden on my heart a long time ago and he placed these wonderful people on my heart. Most of the ones I have been praying for are going through a rough time, some are not professing christians, some are maybe not as close as they should be. The fact that God trusts me with these delicate souls is exciting to me. It is very scary too, because I have a great responsibility to teach the truth of God and some of the things are going to possibly be tough topics to talk about. Also knowing that some of these people have been through some pretty traumatic situations in the past several months is going to be a challenge. The main thing I want them to know is that God and I love them unconditionally. No matter what. I had only three in the class this past Sunday which was the first Sunday, but I already felt a connection and I already feel God is beginning to work. One of the girl's mother told me that she was so excited that she brought her book into the restaurant and showed them. The mother said she was excited about this and that she would be praying for the class. I am so thankful. I feel we all in this class need prayers. I just want to be the instrument God uses. I am surprised that I feel excited and not nervous. I am stepping out of my comfort zone and God has blessed me with a great calm. What a great and wonderful God we serve. If you happen to read this, please offer up a prayer for this class and for me as I try to teach. Pray that God will speak to these hearts and bring us all into a closer relationship with Him.

Father's Day

Well, this has seemed to be the hardest Father's Day ever. Oh we went to church and honored all the fathers. We honored my children's father by taking him out to lunch. But the day was just a hard day. I made a card for my father, which doesn't seem to out of the ordinary, however, my father died Christmas Eve morning. For the most part I think I handled my father's death fairly well. I tried to stay strong for the family, etc. Well, back to today. I took my card to the cemetary, but before I could place it near his stone, I knocked another car's mirror off. It was an accident, but I felt horrible. They were there, as I was, to honor their father's memory and I tried to squeeze passed them. They were parked partly on, partly off the driveway and I thought I could squeeze by. Unfortunately our mirrors connected. After talking with them and the officer, I was allowed to go. I pulled away and the tears came. Not just tears, but sobs. I pulled up and found my dad's stone and placed his card amongst the flowers that were there. I went back to the van and wept. Not just tears of sorrow, but tears of anger. Anger?? Well, first I was angry with myself for not thinking, then I thought I am angry at the fact that I even had to be delivering my father's card to a cemetary. If he would have been at home where he belonged, I would not have to have even been at the cemetary and I would not have knocked that guys mirror off. Then the tears flooded even more as I thought about the past several months after my father's death. My mom has been forced to sell her house because her retirement & social security is not enough to make her mortgage payments. At her age she shouldn't even have to be worrying about mortgage payments. I know we shouldn't be angry over all these things. This is the first I have really admitted that I have had these angry thoughts, let alone voice them to any one. I don't know why I voiced them here, but I needed to voice them to someone. I know God is always there and he hears our every cry. I do believe that, but sometimes I feel I can't voice anger or hurt or disappointment. I know God understands these feelings, but sometimes I feel like I should not be voicing these feelings to God. At any rate, I love the Lord and He is big enough to hear my rants and still love me. I am thankful for that. By the way, I loved my father very much. He was a very good father. Did we always see eye to eye? Not on your life, but I know he loved me. Today more than any other day I would have given the world to be able to curl up in my father's lap and let him hold me like he did as a child and even a few years ago, when I was much older. I guess since I have no earthly father anymore, I will have to climb into the lap of my Heavenly Father and let him place his arms of comfort around me. Thank you dad for being such a good dad on earth and thank you Heavenly father for allowing me to have such a great dad and also for your comfort while he is away.

How many of us, when going through a particularly hard time, have thought I wish the Lord would come back and take us all away? I don't have a death wish or anything, but I've thought how great it would be if Jesus would come back and we'd spend the rest of eternity just worshipping God with out all the troubles of life. Well, I was sitting in church Sunday evening reading and letting my mind wander. I know, I know, I was supposed to be listening to the Pastor, but I was flipping pages in my Bible and happened to come across a passage that if I had read before, I had forgotten. It is not a book I go to frequently, but for some reason it caught my eye this time. The heading in my NIV Bible simply says "The Day of the Lord." I think that may have been why I paused. The passage is found in Amos Chapter 5, verse 18 and following. It starts out v. 18 "Woe to you who long for the day of the Lord." I thought wait a minute, we all look forward to the day of the Lord when things will be much better for us. Right?? The next part says "Why do you long for the day of the Lord?" I would think that would be obvious with the way the world seems to be. Then it says "that day will be darkness, not light." That's not what we want to hear. I have pondered this passage since stumbling across it. For the Christian it will be a wonderful time, when Jesus comes and we're caught up in the sky with him. It will be grand for those who have accepted Jesus as Lord of our lives as gather around the throne and worship the one who created us and saved us. Although for those who don't know Christ as their personal savior it will be a very dark time. It will be a time of great sorrow, not rejoicing for those souls. It made me think how selfish I have been at times wanting my trivial trials to end while there are so many not ready for "the day of the Lord." I need to ask God to help me through the hard times and do my part to pray and ask God how he can use me in reaching those who are not ready. I don't know if any of this makes sense, just some thoughts.

I have truly entered the world of internet. I thought I was pretty savvy when I started emailing and surfing the web. Then I thought I was pretty cool because I was invited to be a "friend" on Facebook AND MySpace. Now I have my own blogspot. I wonder, have I finally arrived? My name is a little unusual. My son & his friend gave it to me. I wonder if they are implying something. Maybe. After 23 years of marriage and two kids, it wouldn't suprise me if I have voices in my head. Seriously, though, as I've thought about this it seems we do have a lot of voices constantly wanting our attention and we want to be sure that in the midst of all the voices we are careful to listen for the one Voice that is the most important. The Voice that guides and directs us in the way that we should go. The Voice that let's us know, in a culture that tells us otherwise, we are loved just because we are who we are. We are not loved because we have money or fame or good looks. We are loved just because. Well-enough on the voices. I hope whoever reads this remembers you are loved. Don't listen to the "voices" of the world, but to the Voice who created you and thinks you're special just because.